Monthly Archives: October 2013

This is the Best Thing

UPDATE: this video needed sound. So we, erm, added some. Click the Link.

Some Jethro tried to rob a liquor store in Anniston dressed as a ghost:

Orrrrrrr, maybe he had just left a “meeting”. Who knows.


Seriously, What the Fuck is Going On

It’s like the CeeDub is baiting us. First they run a column or letter or something that starts “In society today” and now they publish this column or letter or something.

It’s about the Mentalist. Which is a program on the television. I only know this because I’ve seen a commercial or two for the Mentalist and immediately thought “who the fuck would ever watch that show?” Well, now I know because this whole column or letter or whatever is about the Mentalist and the Machine or something. It’s all very hard to follow. Someone called Red John is also involved. I don’t know how Red John is, though he sounds like a pirate of some sort. Anyway, we’re confused.

Doods Have You Been to the Ferg???

Have you doods? I was down there today. I fired up my 28.8 because I was gonna DL some sweet remixes on Kazaa, then post them to Bearshare before I connected to my DC++ hub and updated my homepage with a sweet new dancing baby gif. OMG, have you guys heard these new South Park sound clips? They’re phat. Anyway, I got a new burner so I was gonna download some songs to burn a cd. Pretty sure my diskman will read these. Gotta have tunes in the car! So I logged into this FTP site but it was a bust. Fuck it, I’ll check out some MP3 channels in IRC yo. I’m all like @find this and @find that and shit. Got some sweet Limp Bizkit and deftones. Then I got on AIM because I had an awweeesome away message and I put that shit up and went on Limewire for some Warez and FUCKING SERIOUSLY, WHY DO I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD BE WEARING JNCOS AND A GODDAMN BALL NECKLACE AND HAVE FROSTED TIPS WHEN I’M TRYING TO USE THE INTERNET AT THE FERG?

Shit is slower than fucking ATT Uverse, which is saying something.

Get it together UA, mother of god.


Y’all, 5% of bids accepted were to black girls! All the black girls in sororities can say they have a black friend now!!!!!!!

I wish she would say more letters.

Can we stop with these fucking videos already? God you are a goddamn embarrassment Jbo.

Anyway, here’s the judy bonner video. AHAHAHA, OTHER UNIVERSITIES ARE ASKING FOR WAY TO FOLLOW OUR “LEAD”??? Seriously? Our lead? That is 50 years behind? Oh jbo.

Your Mccarron Moment of Zen

AJ so fly, someone else take his selfie:


Earnestness is the new irony. Really. Irony has become so ironic that now “hipsters” are defending shitty things they like earnestly because they’re so confused. I give you this CW column as evidence. What a brave stand. I would comment more on this, but the Simpsons covered it 17 years ago.

Seriously CeeDub, It’s Embarrassing Now

I have full faith that the CeeDub gave the abortion girl a column strictly as a goof/troll move, but the great experiment has run its course. It’s embarrassing at this point.

It turns out that abortion isn’t the only issue she’c completely ignorant about. Now she’s writing about Obamacare.

She says things like this:

Obamacare forces young people to pay more for health insurance in order to pay for older people’s health insurance, which is costlier than ours.

Yeah, being able to stay on your parents plan until you’re 26 definitely hurts young people.

and, sigh, this:

A health insurance company refusing to cover someone because of a pre-existing condition may sound callous, but that’s how the insurance market works.

This is one of the most ignorant things I’ve ever read anywhere, and I’ve spent some time on 4chan. This girl clearly has no idea how the insurance market works and why pre-existing conditions are used, usually in retrospect, to deny payment on charges that patients desperately need because they didn’t disclose, sometimes didn’t even know they had, a pre-existing condition.

Naturally she swings it around to abortion because she’s utterly incapable of viewing anything without the spectrum of baby murder muddying her thoughts.

I get that this girl is young, not very bright, a lil brainwashed and completely ill-informed; can we stop giving her a forum for her nonsense already though??

Hot Damn


Y’all Need Some Coffee

Someone posted on the Capstone reddit that Chloe’s Cup ain’t doin so well (probably a result of Five and Dunkin Donuts?)

So listen up aholes, go to Chloe’s cup before it closes. We, admittedly, never dug the vibe there. It has always felt more like a tchotchke shop than a coffee shop to us (scuse us for being urban pinko liberals who like our coffee shops dark, with obscure music and staffed by smug assholes. Thanks Obama.)

But, we like local businesses. If you’re a Chloe’s Cup fan, stop in and buy some coffee and a necklace, k?

Update: We’re apparently too late according to

Chloe’s Cup to close its doors for good in Tuscaloosa tonight

CeeDub Columnist Has Never Listened to Pop Music… ever

Someone is writing about Miley Cyrus at the CeeDub because apparently when white people fix racism it’s time to get back to serious business.

The column in question said things like this:

One of the definitions of appropriation is “to take or make use of without authority or right.” Miley Cyrus does not have the authority or the right to try and “sound black,” whatever that’s supposed to mean. The way she is treating black culture is like a piece of clothing. She can put on her T-shirt that says “URBAN” across the front and wear it for the day, but at the end of the day, she gets to take it off that night and still have the privileges normally afforded to white people.

A brave stand indeed, because Miley Cyrus is the first white person in the history of popular music to appropriate an “urban” sound to make money. The. First. Ever.