The CeeDub Hasn’t Made Me Facepalm This Hard in a While

Listen CeeDub, it’s summer, I get it, things are slow. You’re running pieces about protein shakes and how people drink them and you’re probably lol’ing about how stupid most of this summer fluff is (I’m looking at you piece about how the campus has a radio station.)

But this is just ridiculous:

For-profit news industry not avoidable

This is a column about the “FOR PROFIT” news industry and how it is a UNIQUELY MODERN SITUATION. I’m sorry, this was written by a SENIOR! A senior! Are we really asserting here that news organizations are operating “for profit” and this is a new thing? We can’t be right? We understand that news outlets have always been for profit right? We know that right???!?!?!??!

This can’t possibly be a column about how this is a new trend.

It can’t.

Tell me it’s not.

Motherfucker, I’ve read it three times (ok, skimmed it).

I think it is.

Fuuuuuuuuckckkkkk. Who edited this thing?

Who is responsible!?!?!?!?

Hearst Castle would like to have a fucking word with you

For the uneducated, Hearst was a bazillionaire at the turn of the century from fucking newspapers. I just, I just, I don’t even understand. Do people think news outlets were nonprofits before? I mean, we understand that news existed before CNN right?? I’m pretty sure even goddamn Gutenberg was just trying to get paid. Damn son.

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