She’s gonna be on a “celebrity” talent show! Is it Dancing With the Stars? Is it Skating With the Stars? Has someone finally gotten their shit together and brought back Battle of the Network Stars in all its tubesocked 70’s glory? Nope. She’s gonna be on something called Celebrity Diving.
But she’s gonna be on a show with celebrities, real honest to god celebrities! Celebrities like Louie Anderson and Nicole Eggert! Calm down dear reader, uncle Ugly Tusk is gonna treat you right and explain who these folks are. Louie Anderson was a comedian who was in Coming to America (only god can help you if you don’t know that movie) and hosted the boring version of family feud. Then he got blackmailed by some guy he tried to bone because no one and I mean no one knew this guy was gay. Of course by no one I mean everyone. Nicole Eggert was an actress who was on Charles in Charge (remember when Jimmy Kimmel sang a TV theme show as Bob Dylan and you had to wikipedia what show he was singing about? That was Charles in Charge) and Baywatch a hundred years ago.
Yes folks, Miss Webb is really on her way. If things go as they should, she should dump AJ and be dating Scott Baio within a month.
Celebrity competition shows just ain’t what they used to be.