It’s been all of three weeks since Alabama embarrassed itself on the national stage. Thankfully Jarvis M. Britton  of Birmingham came along before Mississippi started getting too big for its britches. This dummy was arrested for making threats against the president. Here’s what he said:

An affidavit filed by Secret Service agent Phillip G. Holley states that Britton tweeted “Free speech? Really? Let’s test this! Let’s kill the president” and “I’m going to finish this, if they get me, they get me! (hash)ohwell. I think we could get the president with cyanide. (hash)MakeItSlow.”

What? I just yelled fire in a crowded theater, no big. Ugh, what a fucking dumbass. No doubt this guy is a commenter at

Well now I’m really confused. I facebooked this kid, click at your own risk as there are many shirtless/awkward outie belly button profile photos. I have to admit, I was expecting more of the redneck guns and freedom, read: white, type. Not this guy.

This, and the presence of a 4chan mask on his facebook, probably explains everything:

So last night playing call of duty mw3 me and a racist was going back and fourth with each other, but turned out we both was just assholes!

I’m talking about the call of duty part. Anybody who knows anything knows that anybody who plays this game regularly is a special kind of asshole.


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